The night before The King and I got married, we met a bunch of friends at The King’s apartment before heading out to a local bar. I use the term “friends” loosely as they were mostly The King’s friends. I had only lived in Seattle a few months and hadn’t made any local friends. Yet.

While sitting in his apartment, waiting for everyone to arrive, I looked at the window and saw a couple walking across the street and towards the building. Although I hadn’t met them before, I was pretty sure it was The King’s friends May and Mr. May. They weren’t walked together. In fact, Mr May was about three steps in front of May.

They both looked upset.*

May and her husband were the last to arrive, so once they got inside, we all packed up and stuffed into a few cars to head out. The rest of the night was spent sitting around a table, talking and laughing. Most of the people there knew each other from their time in the art program in college together.

That evening we all joked and laughed about how everyone was practically related to one another. The King had known May and Smelly since their freshman year. He’d known Smelly’s fiance since 5th grade, and had actually introduced them to each other. Heck, The King had even known Mr. May longer then May had known him. And there I sat, the lone person at the table. I didn’t know anyone except The King. And he wasn’t even really paying attention to me.

A few months after The King and I got married, Smelly had her wedding. The King and I took the day off work and attended their ceremony inside the Seattle LDS temple. Again, I didn’t seem to know anyone else that was there. Until I looked up and saw May sitting here. We exchanged pleasantries. It wasn’t until after the ceremony was over and everyone was outside taking pictures that May and I started to talk. She was cracking me up left and right. And I was digging it.

After that night The King and I made an effort to hang out more with May and her husband. Unfortunately, they lived out in the ‘burbs, so we didn’t see them as much as I would liked. Fortunately, May and I both had jobs that allowed us to e-mail each other during the day. Unfortunately, May and Mr. May decided they were moving away from Seattle.

Mr. May had become disillusioned with his job in Seattle, so they had decided to pack their bags and move to Reno, where Mr. May’s family lived. (Reno!) I begged and cried. And yet, they still left. The King told me not to be so sad. He promised, “they’ll move back.”

Again, May and I were able to e-mail throughout our days at work. It was during this time that we really were bonded. We would e-mail about what outfit we were wearing that day, or about what silly thing our husbands had done the night before. You know, the important things in life.

(All of us together, the night before they moved to Reno, the first time!)

Again Mr. May’s job situation in Reno didn’t pan out. They decided to move closer to May’s family in Orange County. I wasn’t sure if their move to the OC was one step closer to them moving back to Seattle. But I hoped it was.

The King and I flew down to visit them in the summer. We stayed with May’s mom and took advantage of all the sun and fun that California has to offer. We even spent the day at Disneyland with May and Mr. May. Nothing more fun then four childless adults enjoying what Mickey has to offer. It was a fabulous trip and just reminded me even more how much I loved and missed having May around all the time.

A few months later, May informed me that Mr. May had been offered his old job back in Seattle. He was considering accepting. I tried to not get too excited about them moving back, while also praying that they would.

At this point, The King and I were just getting ready to move into the first house we built. We were digging what was going to be our new neighborhood and things were looking up with the prospect of the May’s returning to Seattle.

And things just got better. Not only did Mr. May accept his old Seattle job. But they bought a house in our new neighborhood. On our same street. Mere houses away from our new house.

May was going to be closer enough to almost be my sister-wife. I had visions of eating dinner together every night, taking nightly walks together, getting pregnant the same time, having babies in the same week, our kids being best friends, only to have them grow up and marry each other.

I had it all figured out. And I was happy.

(Me, May, and Smelly during a Girls-Only-Weekend to Portland.)

May and I did do everything together. Okay, we didn’t have dinner together every night. And we missed a few nights of walking. And we had our kids about a year apart. (Although we were pregnant at the same time. But only for about a week. And um, I lost that baby.) But other then that, it was Heaven.

After living so closer to each other, we decided to sell out house and start work on the new house. Even though May and I now lived three miles apart, we still hung out all the damn time. Sure we couldn’t walk together every night, but May was good to drive downtown to hang out at my apartment and I was happy to take the bus down to May’s house.

(Celebrating May’s birthday, weeks after Babboo was born. You’ll notice the matching skirts May made for her and her daughter.)

May was there to help me transition into being a Mother. She was there to help take advantage of my maternity leave. She was there with me to take Babboo to the zoo for the first time.

She was just always there.

And what made it even better was that Lil’ May was there with May.

Spending time with the two of them always made the day better for Babboo and me. It always made me smile and thank the Lord for blessing me with such good friends.

May and I started the tradition of Girls-Night-Out with our small group of friends. May and I were always the ones to organize the outings and May always choose her favorite restaurant to go to. Those evenings spent in the corner of the restaurant was one of the reasons I survived that first year of Motherhood so effortlessly.

(Vesper and May, enjoying one of many Girls-Night-Out.)

And then it happened. Mr. May decided he wanted to go back to school. Apparently his two degrees weren’t enough. He wanted to try out a whole new line of work. And crap, schools in Seattle are way too much money and darned it, it costs too much to live here.

They were selling their house and moving back to Reno.

(Oh Reno, how I loath you.)
Last year, for May’s birthday, I bought her a crate full of flowers to plant in her yard. I thought that, maybe, if her yard was extra pretty she wouldn’t want to move. What it probably did was give her house more curb-appeal and help it sell fast.

So, they sold their house. Made arrangements for Mr. May to start college in Reno. During this May discovered she was knocked up. They both quit their Seattle jobs.

And my heart broke more and more as their move out day approached. Instead of actually dealing with it, I just tried to ignore it was every going to happen. I (secretly) hoped that Mr. May would decided that maybe college wasn’t for him. I prayed that his job would offer him more money. I tried desperately to get him a job with my company. I begged and pleaded with my boss to just give the guy a chance. Alas, he wasn’t hired. During all this, May just kept packing boxes after boxes and making plans to desert me move to Reno.

I spent their last few days in Seattle helping May pack up her house (and by “help” I mean that I stood there talking to her while her sister in law did the actual packing.) I think I tried to contain my emotions and never pleaded for her to “never leave me”, but I may have said those words. I’m not proud.

(Look at May’s cute barley-pregnant belly!)

The King was out of town on business, but he flew home early to say good bye the friends that he loves just as much as I do. We spent the rest of the night laughing and eating McDonald’s and prolonging the inevitable. (While May’s sister in law just kept packing and working hard. Seriously, she was an awesome help to May. Much more so then I was.)

(I love how May and her family are all dressed in bright colors and The King family is dressed in all black. That’s how we roll.)

Eventually, I could no longer deny the time. My poor kid was up later then he’d ever been. It was time to say our farewells and go home to put Babboo in bed.

May and I hugged each other and I got in my car to leave. I was sobbing before we hit the freeway. Months of pent up emotions came pouring out. I was having a hard time breathing and I wasn’t sure if it was from my tears or from the sudden realization that I was without my best friend.

Of course May and I have cell phone with cheap long distance this time around. We still have e-mail and now I have this blog. So really, we’re still connected. And yes, there’s still a part of me that is dreaded this summer, without May by my side at the pool or at the park.

Plus, there’s that little baby she had back in December that I’ve yet to snuggle.

It’s a good thing May and her entire family are coming out to Seattle to visit us (ME!) in a few weeks. I’m seriously giddy with anticipation.

Happy Birthday May! Thanks for always being a good example to me. And extra thanks for doing it with just enough irreverence to make it fun!

*I found out, years later, that they were upset. Apparently May had asked Mr. May to help trim her hair. It did not go so well. Lesson learned, don’t let your husband give you a hair cut.