It’s Deborah, not Debbie.February 21st, 2008 @ 5:01 am
Babboo, The King and I excitedly accepted the invitation to birthday party last weekend. The birthday girl was going to be two years old. The parents of said birthday girl were a couple from church that we are desperate to be friends with.
You see, at the start of 2008 we began going to our new ward at church. (Hey, what in the crap is a ward? A ward is the term us Mormons use to refer to the congregation we’re assigned to attend, based on where we are located geographically). By moving to our new house, we will be living in a new neighborhood. Which means, we will be assigned a new ward. Although we don’t technically live in the ward’s boundaries right now, we figured we might as well start going to the new ward, since we’ll be moving to the new house shortly.
Moving on…
Okay, so now we’re in this new ward (congregation) and we want to make friends there. We’re very happy about all the other young couples in the ward. There are tons of people are own age with kids Babboo’s age. It’s like Heaven. On Earth. Really. Which explains why we were so thrilled to be invited to the birthday party at the house of this family from our ward.
Dude, cool new friends? Birthday party? A night spent outside of our tiny apartment? Where do we sign up?
Needless to say, the invitation to the two year olds birthday party clearly stated “no gifts”, but we all know nobody ever really means that, right? Since we’re dead-ass-broke, I wasn’t in the position to run to Target and buy a toy for this little girl. Instead I did what I did best….
I made her an iron-on shirt. And awesome iron-on, I might add.

We arrived at the party. I scanned the room to make sure I wasn’t under dressed in my jeans while checking out my food options. The King scanned the room looking for a place to sit his tired ass down. And Babboo, well he held on to my leg for dear life. The poor kid hasn’t been in a real life house, that doesn’t belong to a grandparent, in over eight months. He wasn’t sure what to think of all that room. And the toys. And the other kids to play with.
Eventually we all settled down. I began doing what I do best with the other ladies there. Which means I was talking about daycare woes. The other women, all SAHM, just nodded their heads and offered sympathy. Which is all I needed. Babboo stayed with the other kids and played with the toys. The King, well, he talked shop with the guys.
So far, it was a perfect evening.
Until…dun-dun-dun…it came time for the Birthday Girl to open her gifts.
Yeah, a toy.
Yeah, another toy.
And again, a toy.
Three cheers for new toys.
Then Babboo handed her her gift from us. The sweet little two year old opened it up and then tossed it on the floor. I don’t blame her. Kids don’t really care too much for clothes. Plus, we all know the awesome iron-ons are more for the parents anyway. Her mom was embarrassed and hurriedly picked up the shirt off the floor to inspect it. I waited to see her notice Debbie Gibson’s smiling face and wind-blown hair and get giddy about a concert tee for her little girl. Instead she gave a little forced laugh and then held the shirt up for the others to see.
“Who is that?”, asked one of the guys.
I shoot back, “Duh, it’s Debbie Gibson. I mean, Deborah Gibson.”
“Who is she?”
“You’re kidding right? She was totally awesome when we were teenagers.”
And then I realized he wasn’t kidding. He didn’t know who she was. I asked him how old he was and he promptly informed of his age. Crap, he was five years younger then I am.
Dude, I have never felt so old and out of touch as I did in the moment.
Clearly these people have not yet passed The Test to become our new best friends at church. While I don’t have all the The Test written down, I do know “must know who all 80’s mall singers are” is on the list.
And must think I’m super awesome is at the top of the list.
I guess this means I need to step up my homemade gift giving skillz. Maybe I should learn how to make these dolls. I mean, who wouldn’t love to receive a Dog: The Bounty Hunter felt doll?
I know I would.
I rock · Churchy Stuff

Jezer
said,
February 21, 2008 at 11:49 am
I would cherish a Debbie Gibson tee. Too bad for them. I can’t even imagine the misery of a life without the totally awesome cheesiness and sometimes genius of 80s music. I mean, it’s right up there with Mexican food.
Durga
said,
February 21, 2008 at 11:51 am
it’s cliche but the truth is “it’s the thought that counts” .
plus personally when i say “no presents”….that’s obviously what i mean. but i guess that’s not what other ppl mean when they say that. thank goodness u took something to the party. it would have been worse if u didnt have anything when the kid opened the other presents.
i don’t know who debbie is either. but that’s ok coz i was never cool.
Nic
said,
February 21, 2008 at 1:35 pm
I have a mental file of all of the iron ons I’m going to make once my friends start having babies. I think they are awesome. I bet they don’t even know about the Robin Sparkles video…
Operation Pink Herring
said,
February 21, 2008 at 1:54 pm
You did better than I would have, because to me “no gifts” means “no gifts”. WTF? Everyone still brought a gift?? I clearly said ABSOLUTELY NO GIFTS on the invitations to my graduation party a few years ago, and only one person disobeyed. I couldn’t believe even that, I mean, “no gifts”… that’s pretty clear, isn’t it?
Your gift rules because you’re probably the only one who put real effort and thought into it. And I DO know who Debbie Gibson is, but I have to admit that I probably wouldn’t recognize a picture of her out of context.
Ashlie
said,
February 21, 2008 at 2:00 pm
Come on stupids! Who doesn’t know DG? Really?
I would have looooved the shirt.
Rhi
said,
February 21, 2008 at 2:17 pm
These people most certainly did NOT pass the test. I must go listen to Out of the Blue NOW.
And, I’m partial to the Mitch Buchanan doll. I’ll fly to Seattle and we can learn to make them together.
Audrey
said,
February 21, 2008 at 2:34 pm
In the 80s, all I listened to was my mom’s 70s music, so I’m afraid I missed a lot of people as awesome as Debbie Gibson. But I agree with OPH that at least you clearly put a lot of thought and effort into your gift instead of just grabbing another toy off the shelf.
Jana
said,
February 21, 2008 at 3:22 pm
I totally had the pink Electric Youth perfume!! My first concert was DEBBIE Gibson. I would totally love that shirt for my one year old!
David McNelis
said,
February 21, 2008 at 4:24 pm
How do you NOT know who Debbie Gibson is?! I even had, and this is no joke, Lost In Your Eyes come on my iPod this morning on my way to work. And even 5 years younger, and a guy, I would think wouldn’t matter, especially after Deborah’s spread in Playboy. Which was hott (note the two T’s, King), by the way.
Elizabeth
said,
February 21, 2008 at 4:47 pm
Dude, if I had a little girl, a Debbie “Deborah” Gibson shirt would be awesome!
Darn “young” folks nowadays! They probably wouldn’t understand a Wayne’s World reference either.
heidikins
said,
February 21, 2008 at 5:08 pm
I’d totally love an iron-on T from you… and even though I didn’t discover the wonderful Ms. Gibson until a bit after her prime, even I know who she is for heavens sake!
xox
heels
said,
February 21, 2008 at 5:21 pm
They are troubled, these ignorant youth. I fear for the world when there are people who don’t recognize Debbie Gibson.
Jeebus, it’s hard to feel so old…
Eve
said,
February 21, 2008 at 5:38 pm
Yes, it’s hilarious to me when child stars try to change their persona by making their name sound more grown-up. And I love that idea for a gift! I didn’t know you were so creative.
And come-on, the guy was only 5 years younger, really he should have known who she was. The thing about some people is they know the music but not the artist. Maybe if you busted out a rendition of “Electric Youth” or “Lost in Your Eyes” something would have clicked in his wee brain.
Personal I think that would have made for a great party.
Janssen
said,
February 21, 2008 at 6:02 pm
I am on the other side of the issue - I’m by far the youngest of my church friends and it sometimes becomes painfully obvious when they mention some event and I think “I was four when that movie came out.” Alas.
Laurel
said,
February 21, 2008 at 6:04 pm
Isabel, I am 26 and I not only KNOW Debbie G., but owned a hat similar to the one she is supporting on the cover of Electric Youth, all of her tapes, fan books AND the Electric Youth fragrance. Homeboy doesn’t know what he’s missing!
Katie
said,
February 21, 2008 at 6:10 pm
Those people are lame.
I would snort with laughter if you gave my toddler a Debbie Gibson shirt.
Sadie
said,
February 21, 2008 at 6:26 pm
If/when I ever get pregnant, I’m inviting you to every shower and birthday party the kid ever has. Because I would think that shirt was AWESOME.
I love Debbie/Deborah. I even cheered for her on Skating with Celebrities.
Maria
said,
February 21, 2008 at 6:33 pm
If the new peeps don’t work out as friends, to quote other mall-singer-chick Tiffany, “what could have been is better than what could never be at allllll!”
I di hope you get to meet more people through the ward that will be great new friends for you, The King, and Babboo.
I read your post about iron-ons a while ago, and have yet to make one. Now I am inspired to finally make my own!
Laura
said,
February 21, 2008 at 6:49 pm
Shoot, because that gift is awesome! - way better than toys that will just clutter up the house.
I believe I’m about five years younger than you, and I totally know who she is. I danced to her music in my friend’s basement at age 8.
What a letdown, but hopefully these people will still turn out to be cool.
Christar
said,
February 21, 2008 at 7:41 pm
Ok, there’s no excuse to not know who Debbie Gibson is. I’m only 21 and I know who she is! And I also know who Tiffany, Cyndi Lauper, and Pat Benitar are. I’m a total product of the 80’s and my mom was a fierce lover of the 80’s. One of my all time favorite bands is Def Leppard. They still rock.
Rachel
said,
February 21, 2008 at 8:04 pm
Seriously, who hasn’t heard of Debbie Gibson??? That’s just crazy!!! How did that guy ever get lost in someone’s eyes? Sad.
Amanda
said,
February 21, 2008 at 8:27 pm
I have no idea who Debbie Gibson is (dunno if that’s ‘cos I’m too young or ‘cos I’m British?!) but I think the gift is a fantastic idea and I would love to receive something individual and homemade like that than a bought gift if I had children! And if I didn’t know who the person was I’d be like “Oh cool… tell me about her, she must be cool if you did this!!!” Seriously, I like to be educated lol
glamgranola
said,
February 21, 2008 at 8:34 pm
Then they surely wouldn’t know who TIffany was either. I looooved Tiffany! A bunch of my friends had the Electric Youth perfume. My mom wouldn’t let me; it gave her a headache. So unfair that I couldn’t smell like bubble gum like my friends did!
Keri
said,
February 21, 2008 at 8:57 pm
I love the iron ons..remember i suggested you should sell them
Anyway, did you see those dolls? Mr T? Adam & Eve?
Who doesnt know Debbie Gibson. Bizarre.Didnt everyone read their latest issue of Tiger Beat to keep up on her?
Chas
said,
February 21, 2008 at 9:33 pm
Hahahaha! Those dolls are too funny. Something tells me that if they don’t know who Debbie/orah Gibson is then they’re definitely not going to recognize Dog the Bounty Hunter. I would cherish a Debbie Gibson shirt for Lila if one were given to us. I just know it’s going to be toy after toy at her birthday party next month, regardless of if I tell people that we don’t need anymore toys. Oh, and I know for a fact that my husband wouldn’t have a clue who Debbie Gibson is. He remembers little about late 80s music other than Motley Crue.
Anne
said,
February 21, 2008 at 9:36 pm
Electric Youth perfume smelled good! Not a fan of Debbie Gibson, but I would have appreciated the concert-T. I hate “no gift” invites.
Brittany
said,
February 21, 2008 at 10:11 pm
For Christmas I made my FIL (who watches and loves The Office) a shirt that said, “I survived Schrute Farms.”
When he opened it, he was like, “I….. surviiiiiiived…… what?!? Scroot? Shoot? What does that say???”
“Schrute Farms!” says me.
“What’s that?” says he.
“You know, Dwight Schrute….. the beet farm….”
He totally didn’t get it. He didn’t know Dwight’s last name was Schrute. Now I think he feels guilty because he wears that stupid sweatshirt every time I see him.
I feel your pain, sista!
LaLa
said,
February 22, 2008 at 1:48 am
I LOVE it. I think it’s the best gift ever, if only it would fit me, we would so be besties.
Funnily enough I heard Deb being interviewed on the radio the other day, twice in one week. Weird.
Anth
said,
February 22, 2008 at 4:30 am
Dude. I think I am five years younger than you, but I freaking know who Debbie Gibson is. I think these people might not be cool enough for you.
And did The King REALLY excitedly accept the invitation? Because I have my doubts.
Flea
said,
February 23, 2008 at 12:33 am
Oh, I feel your pain! The pain of having been a Debbie Gibson fan! I’m kidding, I’m kidding. Give me REO Speedwagon, Foreigner, ELO or Journey, though, and I’m a happy girl.
Hope you find your friends soon.
angela
said,
February 23, 2008 at 12:38 pm
This story of not knowing 80’s singers sounds pretty darn familiar to me. Usually though, the tables are turned and it’s me who everyone is thinking lived under a rock throughout that decade. And it’s sort of true — my parents were big Oldies fans, so whenever a radio was on, it would be tuned to Oldies. We didn’t get cable in our house either, so there was no MTV. It wasn’t until I was out on my own controlling my own radio stations that I’ve had a chance to catch up. Maybe you should make me a pack of educational onesies.
kittyhox
said,
February 27, 2008 at 3:12 am
Aw, I’m sorry your awesome gift was not appreciated.
Whenever I think of Debbie Gibson (which isn’t often, don’t worry), I remember this comedian a million years ago saying that when asked who her musical inspiration was, she responded, “My Dad.”
Then he did a really funny impression of a middle aged guy with a New York kind of accent mowing the backyard singing, “Shake your Love” while shaking his bum.
“Hey Debbie! Check this out…”
It was so funny that my husband and I still laugh whenever we hear anything about Debbie Gibson.
Needless to say, I would have “gotten” your gift.