The King’s Kontest Korner?November 17th, 2006 @ 7:01 am
Praise the Lord, it’s Friday. Things I’m looking forward to:
- Finding out the winner of the donuts from last week’s King Friday. (Why wasn’t I in the running? Mommy needs some donuts.)
- Cleaning my bathroom tonight.
- Seeing my cousin and his lady-friend, who are flying in from Mesa today.
- Starting work on the Christmas presents my friend May and I just came up with. (They are going to be legendary.)
- The King’s broken rib healing. The poor guy is in some serious pain and the broken rib doesn’t help with the house building project.
- Trying to get a good picture of Babboo to use in our Christmas card.
- Sleeping in tomorrow.
Before I bore you to death with more bullets, let’s see what The King has to say.
————————-
ok, when i said embarassing, i didn’t mean stuff that you needed therapy for. i was thinking stuff like, “i shave my pubic hair into an arrow pointing to my goodies” or ” i sneak into my bosses office and squeeze out a fart when he/she isn’t in the room”. i tell you what, i don’t judge. and i know it was hard to open up for some of you. so thanks for giving us all a laugh. its a tough pick. i’d have to say that not washing one’s hands after going #’s 1 or 2 is pretty out there, but its probably not safe to eat doughnuts (or anything) without a good wash. i hope you dont work in a restaurant. and even though i pretty much spent all week thinking of MK eating doughnuts in bed with no undies on, you cant win 2 weeks in a row. but thanks though. it warms my heart to know that there is at least one other person out there fighting the war against unnecessary underclothing. live free sister! bump it up a notch and stop wearing them during the day too… in fact, let’s all follow MK and make this friday, 11/17/06, sleep nude day. please join us as we all lay ourselves between the sheets, sans clothing (or at least underwear) and sleep unbound by society’s pressures and the itchy elastic. pledge your support.
so i guess this week we have two winners. i only have one doughnut card, so that goes to janet for being the first to admit that she has a blanky. i know there were several of you that came forward in that department, but being first is always the toughest. and second prize goes to jen, the finger picker. i have something special for you. send us your mailing addresses and we’ll get things in the mail. (MK, your prize from last week is still to come. we head to the great white north next week.)
so i never really planned for my weekly post to become a contest, but it seems to be the best thing so far since my mundane existence leaves very little interesting to write about. plus, i want everyone to have a chance to revel in their good fortune and win a fantastic prize. this week’s winner will win an all expenses paid, one year subscription to their choice of the following magazines: glamour, self, or successful farming.
to win this week’s coveted prize, you must answer the following:
if you could impart just one piece of wisdom that you have learned in life, what would it be? the king’s wisdom is this: baby wipes aren’t just for babies. why use dry toilet paper when a sanitary baby wipe will give you a far superior result. underneath this tough exterior is a guy who likes to have that gentle yet thorough post-toilet cleansing that only a baby wipe can provide.
i’m just sayin’, that’s how i roll.
best wisdom wins. oh, and put an extra blanket on tonight if you’re in a colder climate…
-k
The King · Bullet points are your friend
Frema
said,
November 17, 2006 at 9:09 pm
Don’t pick your nose in the car. People can see you.
Not that I’ve done that or anything.
Lisa B
said,
November 17, 2006 at 9:57 pm
Ohhh. How can I git me a subscription to Successful Farming? You guys crack me up!
janet
said,
November 18, 2006 at 12:27 am
yesssssssssss I win!!! You will be extra happy to know that I have slept nude all week. Okay, so I’ve been on my honeymoon and that’s practically required, but still, damn it is nice
Jen
said,
November 18, 2006 at 2:01 am
I love that Janet is posting from her honeymoon in Mexico. The interweb WILL NOT BE IGNORED. You cannot escape it.
I wish I could go back in time and tell my young(er) self to be nicer to my mother. She’s supporting 3 kids by herself, you brat. Stop being such a typical teenager and help out a little. Oh, and she’s right about your boyfriend too. Dump his ass. NOW.
(My disgustingly picked fingers are so proud, and yet so ashamed. I swear, this is the year that I am going to stop the madness and take up twirling my hair or smoking or something instead).
Durga
said,
November 18, 2006 at 2:02 am
For happiness in life n love:
Live simply, Give more, Expect less
CPA Mom
said,
November 18, 2006 at 2:33 am
Eat cookies, preferably freshly baked chocolate chip, when you need to. It’s not the size of your ass that matters but how it makes you feel. And don’t we all need a little chocolate comfort at times?
MK
said,
November 18, 2006 at 3:08 pm
Wow, a day inspired after me!!! You like me, you really, really like me!
I so hear you on baby wipes! They have so many wonderful uses!!!!
alyndabear
said,
November 19, 2006 at 3:22 am
Hmm.. wisdom. Let’s see what I can pull out of my classroom bag o’tricks.
When a kid in your classroom says they need to pee, they need to pee. The end.
carrie
said,
November 20, 2006 at 4:02 am
Baby wipes are good for soooooo many uses, I still buy them at Costco even though my kids aren’t in diapers.
Piece of wisdom: I use Shout (the regular spray bottle kind) on those little spills on the carpet - works like a charm! Stain removal is my passion. Seriously.
Liza
said,
November 21, 2006 at 8:23 pm
The best piece of wisdom/advice I ever got was so good that we incorporated it into our wedding vows, and it comes up at least once/week (usually more often) as a kind of “how are we doing?” measure.
Take on causing your spouse/partner’s life to work for them, moment by moment, no bargining, no negotiating, not in order to get them to do something, but because you can and because you love them.
Even though it seems counterintuitive, when I’m actively doing that for Jill, that’s when my life works the best. And when I forget or get sloppy and caught up in my own shit, that’s when my life gets the most frustrating and unworkable.
Lindsey
said,
November 26, 2006 at 3:43 pm
Is the Kontest still going on? I’ve been meaning to post some advice, but the week just got away from me. Since King Friday seems to be on vacation, literally, I am going to go ahead and enter the Kontest.
The best advice I can give is don’t be afraid to go out in the rain and get wet. Even if you are out and you get caught in the rain, don’t get grumpy or mad, just laugh and enjoy the rain–you can deal with soggy clothes later.
hola, isabel » Who doesn’t want a free subscription to Successful Farming magazine?
said,
November 30, 2006 at 7:16 pm
[…] Remember The King’s last King Friday post? He wanted to hear what wisdom you’ve learned in your life. Not only did he want to hear it, he was offering a very awesome prize for the “best wisdom”. […]
Margarita
said,
December 1, 2006 at 1:20 am
Hmmmm……Don’t eat yellow snow?
Lame advice….I know….but who wants snow that’s been peed on? Not me.
hola, isabel » Let’s see who won a free subscription to “Successful Farming”
said,
December 1, 2006 at 4:24 pm
[…] Thanks all for your words of wisdom. They mean a lot, and we’ll remind our little boy of them as he grows up. […]
love is blonde » how to make your ovaries ache
said,
September 18, 2007 at 12:08 pm
[…] I admitted this on Isabel’s blog last week and won an awesome prize: I still sleep with a blankie every night. The same one I’ve had my entire life. Yes, I am a married woman with a woobie. […]