AwesomenessSeptember 15th, 2006 @ 7:01 am
I know I’ve been talking it up all week. It’s something I’ve been trying to get here at hola, isabel for a long time. And today is the day.
As you all know, I am married to The King. The King is much cooler than I am. Much cooler. Not only is he smart, funny, and hard working, but he’s also super hott.
He’s so hott that he’s even modeled. So what if it was with home improvements implements. Hott is hott.
Besides being all these fabulous things, The King is also a fabulous writer. With lots of ideas and funny stories. I’m not kidding when I say that if there is something wild in this world, The King’s been there, done that.
So starting today The King is going to post every Friday. And if’s there something you’re just dying to hear about next Friday make sure to leave a comment for him. Heck, leave a comment for him just so he knows whether or not you liked his first post. (and I know you’re going to like it.)
(Some stories that I’d like to hear more about from The King may include: The time he was given rat poison by a lady in Germany who loved him, but knew she couldn’t have him. Or the time he spent a week at a nudist resort in California with his best friends. Or even the time the limo driver for his prom locked his keys in the limo. While it was running. Hilarity ensued.)
(What I should have said while giving the toast at my best friend’s wedding.)
In 1983 I had one birthday wish. I had asked my mom for the new Quiet Riot album, Metal Health. It was all over the radio and MTV, and everyone at school had a copy. What can I say? I wanted to rock.
Well, I love my mother. I really do. But she just didn’t get it. I’ll give her credit as she did try. She went to the music store to purchase the cassette for me. It’s pretty personal, one’s taste in music. And going to the music store to buy N*SYNC for your future wife, or Quiet Riot for your young son is a massively demeaning task. I can only imagine what my conservative mother must have felt standing in Tower Records with a Quiet Riot tape in her hands. As she stood at the counter to pay, she looked past the guy wearing the steel mask and straightjacket on the cover and noticed that one of the tracks on the album had the word “bitch” in the title. What kind of an example would she be setting if she gave her son something this inappropriate? What good could this music possibly bring into the home and her son’s life? I’m not sure what she gave me that year, but it wasn’t the tape.
Eric and I have been friends since the second grade. We met on the playground of Eastgate Elementary school when I fell off of a short rockery wall, hurting my knee on the way down. Eric came to my rescue and instead of making me feel like a wuss, he beat the rock with his fists, cursing its existence for the pain it had caused me. We were inseparable from that moment on. We learned how to smoke together. We made bombs together. We even burned effigies of our worst enemies and schoolteachers on crosses in his parent’s back yard together. Our relationship was based on curiosity peppered with a little anti-social behavior. We grew up together, from second grade on, and with few exceptions, shared every lapse in judgment, every poor decision, every criminal act that either of us came up with. He was the friend that you always wished you had. Everyone should be this lucky.
Days after that fated birthday disappointment, Eric came over to spend the night. And, as is customary at times nearing a birthday, he brought a gift. It was the tape. I don’t think I had told him that my mom wouldn’t buy it for me. I like to think that he just knew. I still have that tape. It’s in the player in my VW right now. I can still remember his face when I opened it. It was a look of pride crossed with that certain look that I had the pleasure of seeing many times just moments before we did something that could have potentially resulted in some form of legal punishment. A look that asks, “Is this a good idea?”
As we gather here to celebrate the union of Eric and Gretchen, I see that look again. Congratulations guys. I’m happy for you both. Marriage is like being in a rock band; some days you’re rocking every night, high on blow and booze and that great feeling of success. Other days you’re waking up in the gutter, life in the toilet, trying to figure out where you went wrong. Either way though, you’ll always have that band mate there beside you for support.
So, as we raise a glass to toast the newlyweds tonight, I want you to raise your other fist in true rock and roll defiance and as we get this evening started, remember the words of Quiet Riot:
“Join the pack. Feel the crack. Well, now you’re here, there’s no way back…”
The King
Lizziep
said,
September 15, 2006 at 2:46 pm
THAT IS SO FREAKIN AWESOME!!!! I look SO forward to The King on Fridays.
And King? You are one HOT Home Depot model!!!
Carrisa
said,
September 15, 2006 at 2:58 pm
KING FRIDAYS!!!! How awesome is that?
Great first entry.
Heather B.
said,
September 15, 2006 at 2:58 pm
I really want to hear the rat poison story. Awesome.
Audrey
said,
September 15, 2006 at 3:17 pm
And i thought today was good just because it was a Friday and a payday all at once. But now it’s a King Friday, too? How much better can the day get?
What a great first post!
janet
said,
September 15, 2006 at 3:45 pm
yay for the new feature! I was getting really curious….
And let me just say that is way better than the toasts I have given at weddings in the past. They have mostly consisted of blubbering. And more blubbering, following by Cheers! and some champagne chugging. I really have a hard time with that whole “telling a funny and loving story in public” thing….
Britt
said,
September 15, 2006 at 3:49 pm
So, King, might I infer from this post that you drive a vehicle with a tape player in it, or was that a reference to the past? I ask because I, myself, have not graduated to a car with greater technology, and I’m starting to feel alone in this world.
Jennifer
said,
September 15, 2006 at 4:16 pm
My current car came with a tape deck (which I did end up replacing with an aftermarket, 1-disc CD player, eventually). And it’s a VW. Rock on, brother!
I love the new King Fridays idea. And I really love that power roller in the ad. Do they let you keep those things if you are in the ad? I want to hear the story of how you got to be a power tool model. And, is a power roller really worth buying?
Erika
said,
September 15, 2006 at 4:28 pm
This is going to be good. Lots of great stories! I too want to know how he got into modeling. I’m assuming that’s not the toast you used at the wedding…but it would have been great!!
dee
said,
September 15, 2006 at 4:33 pm
Awesome! I can’t wait to hear more from The King
Frema
said,
September 15, 2006 at 4:36 pm
Man oh man, do I wish my car had a tape desk. There are dozens of early nineties goodness I’d love to jam to on the way to work.
Jess
said,
September 15, 2006 at 5:13 pm
That toast is fantastic. I wish someone had said it at my wedding.
Hilary
said,
September 15, 2006 at 5:13 pm
King Fridays! This is so much better than I thought. I just thought you were getting a new design or something. I can’t wait to learn more about The King.
So, King, what did you say at the wedding because that sounded pretty darn good to me.
Kyleen
said,
September 15, 2006 at 5:58 pm
KING FRIDAYS…excellent! That’s one good toast, would have loved to heard the actual toast.
Great new addition, I was looking forward to what you were going to do.
Christar
said,
September 15, 2006 at 6:28 pm
That was an awesome post! I love it! I’m gonna look foward to every Friday, posts by The King!
It just reassured me how bad I am at blogging. I need to start getting better! You both are awesome at it!
Christar
said,
September 15, 2006 at 6:30 pm
Oh, and I must add that when you were desribing you and your friend at childhood, it for some reason reminded me of my boyfriend and his best friend Dan. I love seeing my boyfriend with Dan because you can tell they are just two of a kind and my boyfriend acts like a little boy when they’re around eachother, lol. Most guys don’t have a friend like that, but should!
HollowSquirrel
said,
September 15, 2006 at 6:33 pm
Come on. Feel the noise.
Totally righteous idea, guys! Now if ya don’t mind, I have to get back to pegging my jeans and pinning Motley Crue buttons on my acid washed jean jacket.
Reesh
said,
September 15, 2006 at 7:22 pm
I felt like I was at your best friends wedding! Just beautiful and welcome to Fridays at Hola Isabel!
Liberal Banana
said,
September 15, 2006 at 7:33 pm
That was so good! I only wish that my man had such mad writing skillz. Good job, King!
(And Home Depot model? How the hell did you land THAT gig?!)
amieable
said,
September 15, 2006 at 7:50 pm
All hail King Fridays!
Welcome, (the) King. Great story! My mom would not let me have Guns N’ Roses “Appetite for Destruction” because the front cover had all those skulls in the shape of a cross and that was heresy. I had actually gotten a free copy on cassette from my friend, but she made me THROW IT AWAY. Aw, moms.
Courtney
said,
September 15, 2006 at 10:17 pm
Rock on, King.
Welcome to our blog world!
Lisa B
said,
September 15, 2006 at 11:06 pm
I bow before THE KING! Great story!
Emmakirsten
said,
September 16, 2006 at 4:13 am
Great story! Can’t wait to read more.
Lizzy
said,
September 17, 2006 at 8:19 pm
Dude. King Friday rocks.
Seriously though? King Friday was the King on Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood.
King Fridays are righteous.
Durga
said,
September 18, 2006 at 2:32 am
Wow so cool to see the King on here.
Great concept “The King of Fridays”.
How did u convince him to do this? Its so great.
DeAnn
said,
September 18, 2006 at 4:52 am
Yay, yay, yay! to posts by the King on Fridays.
Now, don’t cry if we all start only coming to the site on Fridays!
(Kidding! You KNOW we love you, too. Heck, we loved you first!)
Liza
said,
September 18, 2006 at 12:47 pm
OK, that story was completely hilarious! It takes a certain artistry to make Quiet Riot an appropriate topic for a wedding toast — way to go, King!
Kristen
said,
September 18, 2006 at 2:54 pm
What a cool ad!! How awesome is that?!
hola, isabel »
said,
September 18, 2006 at 5:13 pm
[…] It sounds like The King is a hit. I knew he would be. He’ll be back this Friday with more awesomeness. I think he may tackle the tough questions you had for him, like “how did you get into modeling for the Home Depot?” […]
hola, isabel » And now on to more important things
said,
September 21, 2006 at 7:38 pm
[…] Tomorrow The King will be posting again. Make sure to come back to hear what he has to say this week. […]
hola, isabel » Awesomeness part deux
said,
September 22, 2006 at 3:04 pm
[…] Welcome to the second week of posts by my husband, The King. If you missed last week’s installment, I suggest you read it first. […]
hola, isabel » Blog Archive » In which I complain about how busy I am and you all just roll your eyes at me
said,
July 25, 2007 at 2:58 pm
[…] Long time readers might remember back in the day when my husband used to write here every Friday. We called it King Friday, and it was fun. But then he got busy and was relieved of this duty. […]