I am surprised at how often I get asked:

“Are you still having morning sickness?”

Please tell me that it is, in fact, common knowledge that morning sickness (typically) only lasts the first trimester. Are people so dense that they think I am only 3 months along?

Because hello, can you see this belly?

*yes, I got asked this today by a co-worker. A man who has children of his own. So he should be (some what) familiar with our pregnancy works.

When we moved to the new apartment we were told we couldn’t take our satellite with us. We would have to get cable. I called and got it all hooked up (after taking time off work twice), including the new (and improved) DVR. Which will now allow us to record two shows at once, to which I say; “Welcome back ‘Lost’, I have missed you.”

This new cable system has OnDemand, which The King and I weren’t really familiar with. I guess it has an array of shows and movies saved that you can watch at any time. Sounds great, right? It isn’t. It sucks ass.

Since it’s new to us, I am not sure how often they update the selections. I’m thinking about every six month. And the movie options? Not so good. You can only watch “Starsky and Hutch” so many times (three, to be exact), before you are ready for something else. And now that I’m hooked on “Curb your Enthusiasm” I would like to see past the first 5 episodes.

The movies listed are totally random. For instance, we can currently view “Neverending Story”, or “Oceans Twelve”. Not really the types of movies I would categorize together. Although I admit I watched the classic Bette Midler, Lily Tomlin hit, “Big Business” last week. Twins switched at birth, now that’s comedy.

Oh, and then there’s the part about how you can’t fast forward past X1. What’s that about? Does anyone know how to make it go faster? This is especially bad since I usually fall asleep half way through a movie and have to try again the next night. It’s take about 20 minutes to fast forward to the part I’m at. This has gotten really old, really fast.

The King has spent a little too much time researching our viewing options. Did you know they have a place for “Singles”? You can watch submitted videos of local singles. Don’t get too excited. There’s only about four singles out there. You’d think the four of them could just hook up with each other and not have to worry about the video being seen (and mocked) by the rest of us.

You can also watch old “erotic” movies from the 50’s. They are not erotic, in case you were wondering. The movies we saw are little 5 minute vignette of women dressed in leopard print bathing suits bending and stretching to music. I guess even men in the 1950’s needed some type of porn. Even if it’s really tame and innocent.

The one good thing about OnDemand is the exercise channel The King found. They have a 10 minute work out for pregnant ladies. I’ve been doing the workout for a few weeks and am embarrassed to say that it kicks my butt. Holy cow, lugging this baby around is hard work.

No matter how bugged I get by OnDemand, I’m still watching it. Why? Because I hate watching commercials that much.

I was able to visit a local Tongan church yesterday with some friends. I had been there before, but must not have been listening like I was yesterday. Funny that I would say “listening”, since they do all of the service in their native Tongan language. Of which I don’t know a single word of. Not even the word for “Hello”.

When they sang the hymns (also in Tongan) I was so moved. They did this interesting thing where the conductor would sing the first word of each verse of the hymn, then the women in the congregation would join in, and eventually all the men would join in. During the chorus the men would harmonize and follow a few words behind the women. I can not tell you how moving this was to hear. This wasn’t a professional choir. These are just everyday people, who don’t even practice their singing. This is just a cultural thing for them. It’s in their blood.

Since I didn’t know what any of the messages were about during the service, I kept hoping that they would just sing more songs. I may have to go back, just to be a part of that. But next time I’ll get copies of the hymns in Tongan, so I can follow along.

It makes me wish that I had some type of cultural tradition that I had been raised with.

I’m never sure if I should be embarrassed about my addiction to browsing around Target. On one level, it’s a fun place to be. On another level it’s Target: Discount Haven for Women Around the World. Full of items you don’t really need. But damn it, they have such good prices on these things you don’t need. And they are usually covered in glitter. I’m a sucker for anything that sparkles.

On Saturday my friend May came and picked me up. We didn’t know what we were going to do. Only that we were going to be able to hang out together. Something we hadn’t really done since I moved away from the neighborhood (Which, it must be noted, is only 3 miles away). We decided to head up to the Northgate Target. Now the Northgate Target probably doesn’t mean anything to you, but this specific Target is what I like to refer to as a SUPER TARGET. But it’s not “Super” because it has the typical grocery store section. No, it’s “Super” because it has two levels. Yes, two levels of Target goodness.

The King had told me to that I could blow about $30.00 on anything at Target. As long as it was for myself. No presents for people, or things for the baby. Just stuff for me. (The dollar limit is only because we’re trying to save money for this kid. Apparently they cost money. Blah!) I hate to say it, but it’s more fun when there is a dollar amount placed on my shopping trips. It makes it more like a game. Like when you’re a kid and you walk into the candy store with a handful of change and ask the clerk, “what can I get with this much?”.

May and I (and her little girl) walked around Target for hours. We started on the top level and worked our way around. They had all of their winter clothes on sale. Even maternity clothes, which don’t usually go on sale. There were tons of shorts and jackets on sale. Now I know the clothes at Target aren’t that great of quality, but at only 10 more weeks of pregnancy, I don’t need quality. I need cheap and cute. I was able to get two shirts and one sweater. I must add that two of the three items do have some sort of “glittery, beady, jewel accents”. See, I’m a sucker for anything that sparkles. I even had money left over from my $30.00 limit.

By the time we finished with the top level and went down to the main level, I wasn’t sure what was left to look at. May said, “BABY stuff!”. I didn’t want to look at the baby stuff. Mostly because I wasn’t going to spend my allotment on anything for the baby. And because May doesn’t know what we’re having and I didn’t want to give it away by looking at shirts with trucks on them.

We fell into the purse section. Not a section I usually glance in Target. I love me some bargain bags, but admit I haven’t bought one at Target since I was in High School. That was all changed when I spotted the silver work bag/diaper bag. All for $6.00. So cute. (But not cute enough that I actually used it today over my typical black briefcase.)

We ate lunch in the Target cafeteria. I don’t think I’ve ever tasted better Pizza Hut breadsticks. Or Sprite. I also bought a little box of candy for us for the (10 minute) ride home.

I know you’re dying to know what my total came to. I was dying to know. All of this for less than $24.00. It seems some of the clothing items were marked down even more than the tags showed. If I would have known this I would have bought a CD, or some sort of hair product.

May’s total was more than double mine. Haa-haa. (Yes, I am just mean enough that I judge her based on how much more she spent. I told you, it’s like a game to me!)

What a glorious Saturday. (Yes, what makes a Saturday “glorious” is me buying stuff for me.)

I’m really tired today. I have been dragging since about the second I woke up and had to run into the bathroom to pee. That whole scene is getting pretty old.

Plus I keep having these horrible dreams about The King leaving me. It’s not like I’ve had one or two of them. I have them constantly. And he doesn’t just leave me, he leaves me horribly. Like last night’s dream he decided he wanted to have sex with lots of other people and told me that he didn’t even “want to have this baby girl!”. HELLO-the baby is a BOY. Hurt.

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Like most pregnant ladies, I’ve received lots of maternity clothes from people. I’ve had really good luck with a lot of them. Last night I decided to look into the magic bag of clothes and find some “new” things to wear. They were mostly 100% cotton shirts, so I hadn’t bothered with them before. I mean, who has time to iron maternity clothes? There’s all the extra fabric, and mostly they just aren’t that cute. I had some free time last night, so I got out the iron and went to town. (It must be noted that The King also brought me a few of his shirts to iron. I really need to look into getting his shirts laundered for .99 cents. You can’t beat that!)

Today I am wearing one of the fruits of my labor. And I don’t like it. It’s a bright red button down shirt. Plain enough, like I like. But it isn’t black. I’m a 100% black kind of gal. Not only do I prefer my outfits to be all black, but I can’t handle any type of design on them. I’m not sure why. I mean, I’ll look at a cute top in the store and really like it. Until I try it on and the flowers and swirls just gag me. I think they look great on other people. Just not me.

The shirt today has a tie. Why do maternity shirts have the tie? All it does is point out the fact that my boobs are too huge and shouldn’t be let out of the house. Especially not when accented with a lovely little tie beneath them. Blah.

I keep reminding myself that the shirt was free. And I like free.

Tonight we are having dinner with some friends. Mostly to check out their house. The husband is an architect and has done some really cool things to their place. The King is hoping to get some ideas for our new house (and maybe some free advice. Again, we like free). Tomorrow during the day The King will be working at our new house, while I spend some time with my best friend, May. Who I haven’t seen much of since we moved. Because, we’re a whole 3 miles from our old house. That must be like a million miles, since none of our friends come to visit us anymore. (But that’s a whole other post.)

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I was tagged by JenfromBoston. Always fun for a Friday before work.

2 things that scare me: Being followed and not having a Kleenex in my pocket at all times.

2 everyday essentials: A shower and some deodorant.

2 truths: “If you got it, flaunt it”, and “with Faith, nothing is impossible!”

2 of my favorite hobbies: Reading and crocheting (not at the same time!)

2 things you want REALLY BAD: Another trip to the beach, and a very healthy baby boy (also, not at the same time).

2 things that make me a “typical chick”: The fact that I think hot male celebrities are dreamy, and my love for all things that smell yummy when lathered all over my body.

2 favorite items in the house: The King and Preston (if they aren’t home, then the bed and the TV).

2 things that make me cry: Just about anything these days. But mostly when I’ve done something wrong and am worried I’m going to get in trouble for them. And when I’m so mad I can’t calm down.

2 words I WISH I could use to describe myself: Gracious, and selfless.

2 things I do poorly: Funny, I can think of a million things I do well. But none that I do poorly. And really, I’m not good at anything. Oh wait, what about getting motivated, and camping. Or getting motivated about camping.

2 changes I would like to see in the world: How about the end of killing people. And clean water for everyone.

2 words I have trouble saying/hearing: balance (it comes out all wrong when I say it), and G*O*D (easshhh! I just hate hearing people say that word).

I’m not going to tag anyone specifically. If you want to do it..then go for it.

Because things just worked out that way, I was able to work from home yesterday. Or as I like to refer to it: sweet glorious day of sitting in front of the TV and doing some work in between.

I did work. Don’t get me wrong. And I feel good that I was able to get some work done. But the day at home. It was healing.

I hadn’t really slept very well the night before. After my 5am waking to go to the bathroom I slept very deeply. So deeply that I awoke nervous that The King hadn’t woken up and gone to work. He had in fact gone to work. I had just slept through it.

I woke up refreshed and ready for the day by about 8am. I made muffins for breakfast, took a shower, and got dressed and ready. Note that I did put make up on, but I never put shoes on. Not once all day (which also means I never left the apartment).

For some reason my laptop wouldn’t log onto the Internet. My heart broke a little when I realized I wasn’t going to be spending my day reading blog online. But to be honest, it was probably for the best. That way I was able to get my work done a little quicker.

So what did I do all day, you may ask:

1- Ate more muffins then should be legally allowed.

2- Watched all five hours of “The Top 101 Celebrity Oops!”

3- Took a 2 hour nap on the couch (oh how I love the naps).

4- Stared at my naked belly and watched the baby rolling around in there.

5- Thought about going outside to get a hot cocoa from Starbucks, but then realized I didn’t want to go outside. For anything.

6- Watched 2 episodes of “Curb your EnEnthusiasm”, and even though I’ve seen them I still laughed.

7- Finished crocheting the edges around the baby blanket I started when I went to visit my family a few weeks ago.

8- Did searches for random topics on the DVR for shows I might want to tape during the week.

9- Had a Hostess Lemon Pie for lunch. (Have I told you how much the baby loves him some Lemon Pies?)

Then The King came home and put an end to my glorious day on the couch. He informed me that since I had been so lazy all day, we were going for a walk. After dinner (which he made, thank you very much!). Once we finished with dinner and looked out the window we realized it was pouring down rain. No walk for us. Instead I did my 10 minute pregnancy work out video, two times. I figured that was a fair trade.

I do have to admit it’s pretty embarrassing how hard this little 10 minute video is for me to do. It promises to prepare me for “that glorious day, BIRTH“, but 10 minutes a day won’t prepare me for 40 hours of labor. Right, right?!

I was afraid it was going to be hard for me to get up this morning for work. Unfortunately I woke up even before The King got up (he usually gets up first and I get up right when he’s leaving. We only have one bathroom and we can’t share!). I kept sniffling in bed and he finally asked “DO YOU NEED A KLEENEX?”. Apparently (and rightly so) I was bugging him.

While walking to work today I realized my shoes felt a little tight. My beautiful shoes that I bought with my Christmas money, and even bought 1/2 size bigger so they would be sure to fit during the pregnancy. I’m afraid that by not putting on shoes yesterday and binding the growth, my feet have expanded.

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*Did I ever mention that my work has agreed to let me work from home 2 days a week once the baby comes? We decided we would “try it out”. Because honestly, I don’t know how well it will work for me and baby, or for my company. Judging by my day yesterday, it will work great for me and baby. Not so great for the company.